you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
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Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
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