i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
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