Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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