i think my mom watched the whole time
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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