HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize
