You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
