OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
My dad just said "fuck circus"
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Randomize
