absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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