They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
