Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
How does one acquire holy water?
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
