I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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