What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
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