She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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