school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
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