You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
These 23 People Had Sex With Someone From Completely Different Cultures
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
25 Medical Facts That Need To Be Common Knowledge
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do