I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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