singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
