i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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