The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
