Are we in a gay sports bar?
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Randomize
