He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
