I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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