Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
nutella sex= disaster
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?