like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
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