Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
i think im in europe. pls send help
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Randomize
