In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
