what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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