i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
