I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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