My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize