This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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