We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Who died my cat blue again?
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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