This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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