Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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