i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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