today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
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