All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
