well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
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well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
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People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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