Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
The air taste purple.
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