quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
Randomize
