WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
