Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i just had sex bonerless
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
