Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize