i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Rumble strips road head = magical
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
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