I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
