rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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