I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
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I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
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had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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