i would punch a child for taco bell
i think my mom watched the whole time
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
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