thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Randomize
