If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
"it" just moved
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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