This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
