did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
